Virus warning
If you’re feeling really evil tonight, send this to a few carefully selected “friends” and family… Do yourself a favor and read the entire message, it might contain info that will be handy later in the day.
Do not open it. Apparently this one is pretty nasty.
It will not only erase everything on your hard drive, but it will also
delete anything on disks within 20 feet of your computer. It
demagnetises the strips on ALL of your credit cards. It reprograms your PIN number,
screws up the tracking on your VCR and uses subspace field harmonics to
scratch any CD’s you attempt to play. It will program your phone auto-dial
to call only 0898 numbers. This virus will mix antifreeze into your fish
tank. IT WILL CAUSE YOUR TOILET TO FLUSH WHILE YOU ARE SHOWERING.
It will drink ALL your beer. FOR GOD’S SAKE, ARE YOU LISTENING?? It will
leave dirty underwear on the coffee table when you are expecting company.
It will replace your shampoo with hair remover and your hair remover with
Regaine, all the while dating your current boy/girlfriend behind your back
and billing their hotel rendezvous to your Visa card.
It will cause you to run with scissors and throw things in a way that is
only fun until someone loses an eye. It will rewrite your backup files,
changing all your active verbs to passive tense and incorporating
undetectable misspellings which grossly change the interpretations of key
sentences. If the “Badtimes” message is opened in a Windows 95/98
environment, it will leave the toilet seat up and leave your hair dryer
plugged in dangerously close to a full bathtub. It will refill your skimmed
milk with Milk of Magnesia.
******* WARN AS MANY PEOPLE AS YOU CAN. *******
And if you don’t send this to 5000 people in 20 seconds you’ll fart so hard
that your right leg will spasm and shoot straight out in front of you,
sending sparks that will ignite the person nearest you.
Send to everyone…
In case you are a blonde, this is a joke.
