Favourite saying from NYPD Blue (an Andy Sipovitz classic).

T-shirt base by gosco at DeviantArt

I’ve been sat here in front of the screen, finding it hard to deal with the bitter taste of rejection. Bowled over and grateful to the Stock Xchng community for sharing an unending supply of wonderful photos for banners, designs, cd covers, I suddenly got the idea to contribute a few photos. Not that they’re particularly good but might have been useful to someone writing about baking cakes or puddings. Or eggs.

So last night I logged in and uploaded the high res versions of a bowl of eggs and the ingredients for a cake. An hour later I forced myself to stop hitting refresh and close the window.

Bright and early this morning I logged on again, clicked through the recently added photos looking for my masterpieces photos, only to be disappointed once more. “Maybe they’ve got a backlog” I told myself. “Maybe you ought to get a life” an evil little voice on my should replied.

By this evening dejection had settled in. But it suddenly occurred to me to check the forum, maybe this “huge backlog” was being discussed there.

“It can take from 1-12 hours for pictures to be approved.” Oh woe is me! They’ve rejected my photos! Sobbing quietly I set about making supper, kicking the bin petulantly as I passed.

One bowl of yummy leek and potato soup later and I ambled back to the computer. Then it hit me, I wonder if I’ve broken any rules? Maybe the file size was too large? Badly cropped? Too much noise? I had been laughing rather loudly to this week’s Just a Minute while uploading the files.

I headed over to the Upload Rules section.

Remove copyrighted content

SXC does not allow photos that contain logos and trademarks (apart from a few images where it can’t be avoided). Before uploading please edit these out from your photos.

Oh dear. Every packet bears a brand name. Even the eggs are stamped. So they’ve not been rejected for poor quality, it’s all those trademarks and logos. Innit?

So here’s my new, new New Year Resolution for 2007.

A Happy New Year to one and all!

What the best dressed penis is wearing this season – Durex Dickorations are print, cut out and wear outfits for your best mate. What the internet was invented for.

How about us ladies then? Well… is your Betty ready?

From YouTube: a selection of tv bloopers involving uncontrollable laughter, an innovative letter opening device but best of all this gorgeous wee babby laughing his head off.

A small selection of carefully worded put-downs in When insults had class:

“I’ve had a perfectly wonderful evening. But this wasn’t it.”
- Groucho Marx

“Why do you sit there looking like an envelope without any address on it?”
- Mark Twain

Wonderful photography at Flickr:

• *Sakura*’s photostream includes this beautiful shot of a flower;
• C Ray Dancer‘s wonderful take on Princes Street, Edinburgh;
• Murphy‘s shot of one wet Tibetan scores a whopping 10 on the cute-o-meter and while you’re there don’t miss this beautiful shot, “a solitary tree on the Western side of Ingleberrow catches a shaft of December sunlight”.

Oh and a quick postscript while we’re talking about photography, there are some excellent (downloadable) video tutorials by Kent Conklin at 2 Minute PhotoShop tricks.

I’m just about done in now, back to my nice warm pile of blankets on the sofa. Thank you all so much for your kind wishes, they’re definitely big stepping stones on the road to recovery!

I’m starting to feel better now and looking forward to sharing a truckload of shiny new things with you all but I’ve eaten nothing since Tuesday night and am feeling a little wobbly. Plan to go find something bland and vaguely appealing to eat, see if it settles then it’s back to the linkage business toot sweet. Honest guv.

Back to linkage then while I concoct another cunning plan. Quack. Quack.

YouTube clips

• The brilliant Skeleton dance.
• I’d heard about a guy winning the U.S. version of Who Wants to be a Millionaire but here’s the video: John Carpenter does it with style.
• Man in petrol station gets bowled over.
• Matrix ping pong.
• Boy on roundabout (ouch!).
• Slamball accident (double ouch!).
• Dancing robots.
• Incredible break dancing.
• Crazy frog brothers
• Star Trek XXX (only funny with the sound on but NOT safe for work!).

The rest

• A story that you need to read while humming the theme tune to Neighbours (that last link is Not Safe for Work).
• I am curious – another Snopes story, this time about an illustration withdrawn from the Yellow Pages when someone (who?!) realised that it revealed a saucy image when a portion of it was viewed upside-down.
• Technology marches ahead on a daily basis, who’d have thought that virtual scratch and sniff would one day be so easy to achieve?

Coming up

Dogs, music and another mixed bag.

Part 1
Now that you are a grown-up you are allowed to have __________ and _________

Part 2
Now that you are a grown-up you are not allowed to have __________ and _________

It’s possible that I’ll have unbridled access to a borrowed wifi laptop but that could be a vicious rumour. Failing that, see you all Sunday. Be good. And if you can’t be good, be careful :-)

Where was I? Oh yes, keeping things tidy. Don’t you think that anti-litter campaigns would be more successful if they used these five French students and their video?

While looking for that picture I came across a lovely picture from Wales of Bragdy Gwynant Brewery, “The World’s Smallest Commerical Brewery”, near Capel Bangor, Ceredigion. But it’s the two comment exchange below that tickled me. Oh and Andrew will enjoy this signpost to the Dalek Musem when he comes back to blogging.

Next up is the most unusual search engine referral this week: What would you put on your bread if you lived in Glasgow? Not just an odd question but Blue Witch is right there on the same page. Small world, eh? But to answer the question, I think it would have to be Welsh butter, fresh roast chicken, lettuce, tomato and mayo. Mmm, yes. It’s what bread was invented for.

Just quickly before I get me to my bed

• Clinton’s response to Ann Coulter’s claim that he’s gay.
• The World Map of Happiness (Austria??)
• PhotoSynth from Microsoft Labs – “…takes a large collection of photos of a place or object, analyzes them for similarities, and displays them in a reconstructed 3-Dimensional space.” [Via MetaFilter.]
• Stuffed mouse pattern [PDF format]
• The PVC Workshop, how to make things for your home from pvc piping. Napkin rings! A table dolly! Come to think of it, I could try making something to attach to the vacuum to clean behind radiators…
• I think I’ve mentioned this before but it’s so good it deserves a second mention, Joseph North’s Sweetie icon set.
• The Senior Dogs Project is a huge resource for those lucky enough to adopt an older dog.
• I had no idea what a snickerdoodle was but the name alone makes me want to try them out. Here’s the recipe from the Food Network.
• A collection of baby animal pictures. Aaaawwww. Eeek!
• Varieties of left-handed writing.

Oh dear, all this talk of sarnies and snickerdoodles has my belly rumbling. I’m off for a bowl of cornflakes…